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Crazy-Makers: Dealing with Passive-Aggressive People

Why Are People Mean? Don't Take It Personally!

When You Have Been Betrayed

Struggling to Forgive: An Inability to Grieve

Happy Habits: 50 Suggestions

The Secret of Happiness: Let It Find You (But Make the Effort)

Excellence vs. Perfection

Depression is Not Sadness

Conflict in the Workplace

Motivation: Intrinsic vs. Extrinsic

20 Steps to Better Self-Esteem

7 Rules and 8 Methods for Responding to Passive-aggressive People

Promoting Healthy Behavior Change

10 Common Errors in CBT

What to Do When Your Jealousy Threatens to Destroy Your Marriage

Rejection Sensitivity, Irrational Jealousy and Impact on Relationships

For Women Only: How to Have the Relationship of Your Dreams

What to Do When Your Partner's Jealousy Threatens to Destroy Your Relationship

Making Attributions for a Healthier Attitude

Happiness is An Attitude

Thinking Your Way to a Healthy Weight

Guide to How to Set Achieveable Goals

The Effectiveness of Cognitive-Behavioral Treatment for Anxiety Disorders

Co-Dependency: An Issue of Control

The Pillars of the Self-Concept: Self-Esteem and Self-Efficacy

Catastrophe? Or Inconvenience?


Panic Assistance

Motivational Audios

Mindfulness Training

Rational Thinking

Relaxation for Children

Change Yourself--Don't Wait for the World to Change

Loving Kindness Meditation

Self-Esteem Exercise

Meadow Relaxation

Rainy Autumn Morning

Energizing Audios

Quick Stress Relief

Thinking Your Way to a Healthy Weight

Lies You Were Told

Choosing Happiness

Lotus Flower Relaxation

Audio Version of Article: Crazy-Makers: Passive-Aggressive People

Audio Version of Article: Why Are People Mean? Don't Take It Personally!

Audio Version of Article: Happiness Is An Attitude

All Audio Articles

Kindle Books by Dr. Monica Frank


Why You Get Anxious When You Don't Want To

Why People Feel Grief at the Loss of an Abusive Spouse or Parent

“Are You Depressed?”: Understanding Diagnosis and Treatment

15 Coping Statements for Panic and Anxiety

Beyond Tolerating Emotions: Becoming Comfortable with Discomfort

Emotion Training: What is it and How Does it Work?

How You Can Be More Resistant to Workplace Bullying

Are You Passive Aggressive and Want to Change?

When Your Loved One Refuses Help

The Porcupine Effect: Pushing Others Away When You Want to Connect

What if You Considered Other Peoples' Views?

5 Common Microaggressions Against Those With Mental Illness

What to Expect from Mindfulness-based Cognitive-Behavioral Therapy (MCBT) When You Have Depression and Anxiety

Does Cognitive-Behavioral Therapy Lack Compassion? It Depends Upon the Therapist

When Needs Come Into Conflict

What to Do When Anger Hurts Those You Love

A Brief Primer On the Biology of Stress and How CBT Can Help

50 Tools for Panic and Anxiety

Coping With Change: Psychological Flexibility

Breaking Up is Hard to Do: Ending a Bad Relationship

I'm Depressed. I'm Overwhelmed. Where Do I Start?


Building Blocks Emotion Training

Hot Springs Relaxation

5 Methods to Managing Anger

Panic Assistance While Driving

Autogenic Relaxation Training

Rainbow Sandbox Mindfulness

Mindfulness Training

Riding a Horse Across the Plains

Cityscape Mindfulness

Change Yourself--Don't Wait for the World to Change

The Great Desert Mindfulness

Tropical Garden Mindfulness

Thinking Your Way to a Healthy Weight

Lies You Were Told

Probability and OCD

Choosing Happiness

Magic Bubbles for Children

Lotus Flower Relaxation

Cloud Castles for Children

Hot Air Balloon Motivation

All Audio Articles

Passive-Aggressive Examples

The following are examples from website readers of passive-aggressive encounters they have experienced. Keep in mind that the suggested responses are not personal advice as a full evaluation of the situation is not available. As such, the suggestions may not work in every situation but are to give you an idea of possible ways to respond. Read: Crazy-Makers: Passive-Aggressive People and 7 Rules and 8 Methods for Responding to Passive-aggressive People

Next Example

  • Passive-Aggressive Example 1: Wife's Withholding and Denial

  • Passive-Aggressive Example 2: Boyfriend's Critical Roommate

  • Passive-Aggressive Example 3: Mother-in-law and Communication Problems

  • Passive-Aggressive Example 4: Sibling Won't Help with Elderly Father

  • Passive-Aggressive Example 5: Mother's "Helpful" Criticism

  • Passive-Aggressive Example 6: Wife Deflecting Problems to His Anger

  • Crazy-Makers: Passive-Aggressive People

    I'm sure you've dealt with individuals who have caused you to be so frustrated that afterwards you scratch your head asking "Am I crazy?" Most likely you just had an encounter with a passive-aggressive person. Such encounters may include sarcasm, shifting blame, saying one thing while meaning another to name a few...The problem with these kinds of comments is that if you try to confront them about the insult, you will be accused of not understanding, "I didn't mean it that way" or of misinterpreting, "You must have a problem to think that. I was just trying to compliment you. Sorry I didn't word it right to suit you." As a result, you end up looking like the bad guy, feeling frustrated, and asking yourself, "Am I crazy?" And the other person walks away blameless. Read more...
  • Passive-Aggressive Example 7: Co-Worker's "Joking" Criticism

  • Passive-Aggressive Example 8: Husband's Passive-Aggressive Avoidance

  • Passive-Aggressive Example 9: Volunteer Using Victimization to Control

  • Passive-Aggressive Example 10: Sister's Lack of Support

  • Passive-Aggressive Example 11: Grandmother's Critism of Child

  • Passive-Aggressive Example 12: Disrespectful Attitude from Adult Child

  • Passive-Aggressive Example 13: Sarcastic Ex

  • Passive-Aggressive Example 14: Boyfriend Gets Defensive

  • Passive-Aggressive Example 15: Mother-in-law Wants to Be Center of Attention

  • Passive-Aggressive Example 16: Parents' Criticism of Bride

  • Passive-Aggressive Example 17: Is She Passive-Aggressive or is She an Extrovert?

  • Passive-Aggressive Example 18: Is it Passive-Aggressive or is it Aggressive?

  • Passive-Aggressive Example 19: Confronting a Passive-Aggressive Insult

  • Passive-Aggressive Example 20: Living with Blaming and Guilting Mother (Part 1)

  • Passive-Aggressive Example 21: Living with Blaming and Guilting Mother (Part 2)

  • Passive-Aggressive Example 22: Living with Blaming and Guilting Mother (Part 3)

  • Passive-Aggressive Example 23: Living with Blaming and Guilting Mother (Part 4)

  • Passive-Aggressive Example 24: Child Holding Family Emotionally Hostage

  • Passive-Aggressive Example 25: Got His Way at a Cost

  • Passive-Aggressive Example 26: "I will take care of it just as I ALWAYS do!"

  • Passive-Aggressive Example 27: Insulted by Thank You Notes as a Gift

  • 7 Rules and 8 Methods for Responding to Passive-aggressive People

    The most difficult social conflict usually involves passive-aggressive (PA) behavior. The reason it is more distressing than even aggressive behavior is because it causes the recipient to be doubtful of him or her self. When someone is aggressive towards you, their intention is clear and it is easier to make a decision such as “I need to steer clear of this person” or “I need to report this behavior.” However, the purpose of passive-aggressive behavior is for the aggressor to avoid responsibility for their actions. PA behavior can easily be denied or blame shifted: “I didn't mean it the way you took it” or “You're being too sensitive” or “You're just trying to get me in trouble.”

    As a result, PA behavior cannot be addressed in the same way you might handle aggressive behavior. When managing PA people you need to be aware of the underlying purpose of the behavior so that you can respond in a way that prevents them from succeeding at their agenda. The less likely they are to achieve their goal, the more likely you will see a reduction in their behavior. Read more...
  • Passive-Aggressive Example 28: Adult Son Deliberately Upsetting Mother

  • Passive-Aggressive Example 29: Handling a Backhanded Compliment

  • Passive-Aggressive Example 30: Trap of Demanding Private Thoughts

  • Passive-Aggressive Example 31: The Passive-Aggressive "Nice" Mother

  • Passive-Aggressive Example 32: Another Passive-Aggressive Mother and Planning a Wedding

  • Passive-Aggressive Example 33: Husband and Wife Mutual Sulking

  • Passive-Aggressive Example 34: Controlling by Refusing to Discuss Problems

  • Passive-Aggressive Example 35: Confronting Step-son About Not Visiting

  • Passive-Aggressive Example 36: Husband's Unreasonable Expectations of ADD Wife

  • Passive-Aggressive Example 37: Back-Stabbing Doctor

  • Passive-Aggressive Example 38: Why Does My Husband Want a "Reward" for Hurting Me?

  • Passive-Aggressive Example 39: Deliberate Annoyances Followed by Denial

  • Passive-Aggressive Example 40: What Do I Do When I am Ignored Most of the Time?

  • Passive-Aggressive Example 41: Problems with Adult Child Living at Home

  • Passive-Aggressive Example 42: Passive Control as a Form of Passive-Aggression

  • Passive-Aggressive Example 43: Getting in the Middle of Passive-Aggression

  • Passive-Aggressive Example 44: Screaming and Calling Names is Aggressive, Not Passive-Aggressive

  • Passive-Aggressive Example 45: Son with Depression Blames Parents

  • Passive-Aggressive Example 46: Caretaker of Passive-aggressive Mother

  • Passive-Aggressive Example 47: The Perfect Backhanded Compliment

  • Passive-Aggressive Example 48: When "I'll Pray for You" is Passive-Aggressive

  • Passive-Aggressive Example 49: Brother Manipulating Mother to Hurt Sister

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